WELCOME!

by Idaho Chubbs

In a realm before existence existed, before GOD/Zeus/Pac-Man Jones (he/she/it/me/you hasn't always been there. Wrap your mind around THAT!) knew how to burp up their mother's milk (no Frusciante intended). Before caffeine was used as a stimulant, before cocaine was unhealthy, before Otto Von Bismark made scars stylish in Prussia, before King Tutt's Facebook page, before Hades, before Olympus, before a world full of regret, happiness, depression, uncertainty, stock-brokers, rock-stars, artists, fun times in the Middle-East, and ponzi-scheme martyrs, there were....THE UNFORTUNATES! Deloreans solve so many existential problems in-betted in the every day psyche. We are not unstuck in time like our "unfortunate" amigo Billy Pilgrim. We, Prince Tebow, King Brody, Idaho Chubbs and our other Bard alumni have a choice to change our destiny and YOURS. Like my good friend Thomas (Voltaire's formidable understudy) once told me, "I have known joy in peculiar moments, unearned and sudden." Such is life and such is time travel. Come join this merry band of Misfits of Science (Courtney Cox is a cougar NOW?) as we traverse the literary fiction/Nectar-soaked/multi-dimension-space-time-continuum, sharing our trials, tribulations, love of college football, self suicide, political assassinations of the extreme left and right (let's kill the middle too for kicks) and Bergman films made out of Lego construction paper sadness; playing our brand of music that you've always loved yet never heard before. You might hate it at first but then, suddenly, without any sort of logical comprehension....You'll LOVE IT!